Saturday, June 21, 2008

I'm flattered but....no

The other day I was chatting with my friend in the arts office about the usual stuff. How did the movie look? Did I work the camera like a kangaroo on Starbucks? How's the family? Stuff like that.

I always ask about video shoots because I want to go along on one and see how it's done. Usually all the video shoots are in the early morning or on days when I am working on something. At some point in my recent years I have started being fascinated with film and drama. I'm amazed by it, I love to learn about it, and see it happen.

I was asked if I would like to be an extra in one of the movies. I very quickly said no.
Public appearance stuff is about the only line I am not willing to cross.

I will write something for an audience, but I can't stand up and speak in front of them.

I can use a camera to record someone speaking, but I dodge the lens when I can.

I don't even have yearbook pictures when I was old enough to avoid them, I didn't want to remember what I looked like about 20 years down the road. Denial is good.

I really don't mind doing about anything I am physically capable of doing to help out, but I am scared to death of being in front of people. I didn't use to be so shy, but I don't feel that comfortable in my skin anymore. So part of it is wanting to be behind the scenes and another part is I am terrified to be seen.

You add that to Youtube and that makes me duck or turn around when I see any flashing red lights. I love Youtube, I can listen to my bad 80's music and see some stuff that entertains me, but I don't ever want to be on it.

Besides am I the only one that thinks this....I think I sound pretty nice and don't mind hearing me talk as a general rule. I listen to a recording of me though and I go "WHO IS THAT?!" I sound like a mumbling nasal teenager. Knowing that alone makes me not too eager for recorded medium. I mean I can't even watch my vacation videos without cringing.

So this shoot that is coming up, pray that I stay strong. If a bunch of guys try to talk me into it I have to remember that I will live to regret it. Let's keep as much of Janus as we can off other forms of media.

no no no.

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4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I heard your voice a long time ago, and you have a nice voice. It's kind and gently, and it puts people at ease. I have squeeky voice, and I hate it.

But I can sympathize with you. Crowds scare me, and the thought of being an extra in a film is terrifying. And I hate getting my photo taken.

So are you gonna lend your voice to someone's film? Or even direct it? Let us know what happens.

Frodo (:

8:24 PM  
Blogger Snaggle Tooth said...

The trick is to delude yourself that any camera exists n continue as usual. Of course, I can act, n have done plays on stage, after being on crew a few years.

I listened to myself on cassettes as a child, n learned to lilt my voice n pronounce more slowly n clearly on purpose into the mic while recording myself. I spent alot of time playing with the recorder- I used to conduct on the spot fantasy-role-playing interviews with friends. My sis once played Ted Kennedy, for example- who I kept mis-calling "Ed". "That's Ted!"
I still listen to n laugh at those tapes! Wish I could find the one with my drunken Gramps singing old Scottish bar tunes-

I was on several music videos in friends high school films like "Splish Splash," danced on TV & exhibitions with the folk club, n have given speaches to auditoriums of people (like Girl Scouts of America). I gave a dissertation in college, n made some short films n animations for video class. I like being a director, but I think acting is easier.

1:46 AM  
Blogger Janus Torrell said...

Well Frodo I will let you know what happens, probably no to the two of them. I am better at writing than directing (At least thats what I have been told...not amazing with either anymore.)

Crowds, film, photos...I totally relate.

10:56 AM  
Blogger Janus Torrell said...

Snag, I never knew you were on stage.
A whole new side of you to add to photographer and blogger.


I used to play with the tape recorder too...never got that James Earl Jones voice one dreams of having for broadcasting (Not that I could sound like James Earl Jones of course.)

10:59 AM  

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