Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Things to do while your car is having diagnostic tests

(Yes this was what I almost wrote yesterday)

1) Read golf, boating, and men's fashion magazines. I really don't know why all waiting rooms have these. Either golf and boating is more popular than I realized or these magazines are marketed to waiting rooms.
This afternoon I decided to buy a pontoon boat. I will purchase this boat when I win the lottery which I don't ever buy tickets for. So this might take a while.
I also learned how to "Build the Swing I Want" (in golf, not for the porch.) I used to think golf is pretty meaningless and a waste of time, but then my friend won a $50,000 dollar prize playing golf. Golf is still fairly meaningless and a waste of time to me, but not nearly as much in general I guess.
As for men's fashion, I am too out of touch and broke at the moment. I will worry about being stylish roughly after I win the lottery, get the pontoon boat, and take golf lessons.
Ack so much for this.
Too bad they don't have Highlights magazine here, so I can keep up with important issues like The Timbertoes and finding a pencil hidden in a drawing of a Hippopotamus in a tutu riding on a unicycle.
Ranger Rick has nice photos of lemurs too. Alas, this is a car dealership, and a Buick one at that. I guess they don't think that the average 50+ year old white male that drives Buicks would care about lemurs.

2) They have those puzzles with the triangle peg board and golf teas. You know what I am talking about right? They are like the Rubik's Cubes and the connecting horseshoes trick. I can only get it down to two pegs though.
Two pegs.
Two pegs
Three pegs. Damn it.
Enough of this crap. Stupid puzzle.

3) Soda and Snack machines. I remember when sodas were 50 cents. $1.25 for a can of Coke? I can't drink soda right now anyway. I am talking about prices from years ago. Oh no, I'm turning into my dad! Curse you Buick!

4) Free coffee. Too bad I really don't drink coffee. Besides it's hot and humid outside, so why would I want a steaming 'Cup of Joe?' Why do they call it Joe anyway? I'm going to google that later. I'll just drink some 5) free water instead. Weeeeeeeee!

6) Newspaper. No Comics? Well there goes that. I'm not up for reading the riveting Transportation section.

Wow, I sat back down after finding all the stuff to do here and the chair makes a suspicious sound that had everyone in the waiting room looking at me.

It's the chair....really.

I'm sure they don't believe me.

7) Watch Fox News with the other 50 year old kids. Someone turned on the TV and to the news. Ack, I hate the news. I don't care about Mccain, Obama, or Brittney Spears. Call me a bad citizen if you want, I am more worried about me.

8) I can't believe I wrote this entire list on scratch paper. I better check on my car. I'm getting hungry.

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Things to...

Nevermind, its late and I am tired. I will have to belt this one out tomorrow.

Off to Never Never Land for me

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